Letting Go….

Hi, my name is Nancy and my superpower is worrying and overthinking. Everything. Or at least it was. With the new year I have decided to let go of my superpowers for a bit. Or at least try to. If you’ve read my posts before, then you know I over plan and over think and over worry. Is that really a thing? I think it can be. I think there is nothing wrong with a bit of concern, but when we take it too far and what ever we are concerned with takes up all our thoughts, well yup you got it!, over worry.

So, while I might not admit to making a New Year’s resolution, I usually do; I just don’t tell anyone, so that way if I fail, no one has to know. Pretty good plan, huh? Well, this year it isn’t so much what I am adding to my resolve, like exercise, but what I’m leaving behind. I’ve decided to leave the past, right where it should be, the past. Everything that went wrong and everywhere I fell short, or others fell short. I’m just going to not bring it up in my mind. This year is a new chance for falling short, both mine and others.

When we hold onto those past short comings we label people and ourselves in such rigid ways, that we end up only seeing ourselves and others in that way. So we enter a new year expecting the worst from ourselves and others. We limit them and us and restrict any growth.

I really don’t like labels. People can move forward and grow. We are all capable and with God’s help we will continue to grow in our faith walk and in life in general. No one would expect a kindergartner to do Algebra and neither would they stay at the kindergarten level. They will grow and learn. Adults can grow too. We learn from the past and give ourselves the grace to move forward despite making past mistakes. We should offer this grace to others as well. Putting the past behind and moving forward is not just a cliche, but is a part of living.

But what about worry? Are you going to mention that again? Yes. Yes, I am. I am still a work in progress in this area and a verse came to mind this morning as I thought about what to write. It’s from Matthew: Here’s Jesus’ words on the subject of worrying: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?(6:25-27, NIV).

Many of you might be familiar with this passage, but I think the best part is found further on in the reading of chapter 6 from verse 34;  “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for today is its own trouble” (ESV).

Ahh, see there’s my biggest nemesis! Being anxious and worrying about things that haven’t happened yet. Today is enough for today. And this is also where letting go of the past comes in. I think much of what we base our worry and anxiety on is from our past. If something went wrong before, surely it will go wrong in the same way tomorrow, right? Well, no. Yesterday’s mistakes were so yesterday, tomorrow’s mistakes will be tomorrow’s, we need to be concerned about today. And when we focus on that, the part about not worrying about our stuff, as mentioned in verses 24-27 about food and clothes comes in to play. Don’t be anxious about tomorrow. Think about today. And oh yeah don’t worry about today. God’s got this. That might be a unofficial version of the text, but I think that is what it is saying. Just something to think about. God Bless -Nancy

20/20

Their faces appeared suddenly in the video and at once I was transported back to a time that, although not many years ago, still seemed like a life time. So much had changed about them and about me since are paths had first crossed. I wasn’t alone watching the video, but the crowd watching with me were unaware of my connection to those faces staring back at me in the video. They had not seen the video before  or the  faces before, but I had. My mind quickly replayed the last time I had seen these people and then quickly fast-forwarded to what I knew of about them now. A few had changed in appearance, some retired from full time ministry and a few others had become entangled in a controversy with a fellow church leader.  It was as if I was staring at my past, while considering where I was now. It was a weird place to be where the past and present meet.

But, as time has moved me past what might have been in serving with these particular faces from the past, I have learned to trust God. He has my back, to speak in modern terms. I was reminded today of the often quoted verse from Romans 8:28; “And we know that in all things God works for the good for those who love him, who have been called according to His purpose” (NIV).

I admit, I still do not have the perfect 20/20 hindsight vision to understand why things did not work out to serve with those in the video, but I see a glimpse of the reasons at times. God has His reasons and I know I have grown as a Christian since. Maybe I wouldn’t have grown as much if things had worked out in the way I had wanted them to. At the time, it was difficult to feel rejected, to be judged and evaluated by my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ and shown to be falling short of their standards. It hurt. Quite a bit in fact. But now, I am content with the past, the “almost was”. God was working out everything for my good, and now I can look back and reflect upon it.

Sometimes we might think that we are moving so slowly towards the future and the goals we have set out ahead of us. When we look backward, we can actually see how far we have come and how God has been there, working it all out. When we  realize this, we can move forward,trusting Him as we face new situations that will be our next “almost was” situations. God is faithful and His promises are true. -God Bless- Nancy