hope

The Longest Night

The people walking in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of deep darkness a light has dawned. (Isaiah 9:2, NIV)

December 21 is the longest night for the Northern Hemisphere. It is a time when the hours of darkness will exceed the hours of daylight. It is also happens in one of the coldest months of the year; December. It is also right before Christmas, a time to celebrate the birth of Christ. A time of lights and decorations here in the United States. My neighbors each try to outshine each other with lights of many colors; some white, some multi color, some LED, and some traditional incandescent. It is a pleasant surprise to turn the corner into our neighborhood in the dark of evening and be met with the lit up houses, trees and bushes. The lights pierce through the darkness of the night. It is both beautiful and cheerful.

But, before the lights are strung, there is a time of darkness that overtakes the neighborhood. The weather is cooler, the days shorter, the leaves have fallen off of the trees and the flowers are long gone. There is a quiet loneliness that descends upon us, until the lights are put up and the celebrating begins. We wait all year for this moment to light up the neighborhood.

Waiting for the light to come was also something people experienced in Isaiah’s day. They longed for freedom from their oppressors. A time when their anointed Messiah would come and deliver them. Isaiah prophesied this day, when the people would see the light. But would they recognize Him?

The answer is of course, mixed. Some did recognize Jesus entrance as a baby in a manger, namely the wise men and the shepherds. Later, as Jesus began His public ministry, some would choose to follow, while others rejected Him, As John writes in his gospel; “The true light that gives light to everyone was coming into the world.He was in the world, and though the world was made through him, the world did not recognize him.He came to that which was his own, but his own did not receive him.” (John 1: 9-11, NIV).

We read both the passage from Isaiah and from John’s gospel, and we shake our heads in wonder (and in judgment) of the people back in those time periods. We might wonder why they didn’t understand the words the prophet spoke. Why they couldn’t figure it out. We too easily forget that they did not have the perspective we have after the fact of Jesus’ birth nor the New Testament scriptures.

But, maybe the reality is that they did not like the light. It exposed their own darkness. The darkness in their own hearts. A messy house looks tidy, as long as you don’t turn on the lights. The darkness provides cover for those seeking to hide.

Most people prefer the light rather than stumble around in the dark. The dark can be scary because you cannot see where you are going or what dangers lie on your path. I know this all too well as one Christmas, I tried to walk back into my living room in the dark to retrieve an item. I chose not to turn on the lights and I broke my toe on a piece of furniture I did not see in the dark. It was painful.

Sometimes the darkness is not physical at all, but darkness that saddens us. We feel like we lack a guiding light to help us get out of the dark times in our lives. We wait in hope and anticipation of a time when help will come. When we too, will be delivered from darkness. It can feel like the longest night of the year. We don’t recognize the light that has already come into the world. We try to make our way, but fail to look to Jesus for our help. Our darkness seems to overshadow us and blind us to see.

The Bible is referred to as a lamp and a light. It is for a reason. We can lose our perspective, just like those in people in Isaiah or John’s time. But, we have a decided advantage; the entire Bible. We can read the promises and prophesies and see how God accomplished them. We can read the Gospels. We can see the future God has for this world laid out for us the Book of Revelation. Our deliverer has come and we can have confidence that He will return. He promises us a hope and a future.

Although it is bleak now, light has come and is coming to deliver this world once for from the darkness. God comforts us and gives us hope. Let us put our confidence in that. – God Bless – Nancy

What Are You Thankful For?

“Let us come before him with thanksgiving and extol him with music and song “( Psalm 95:2, NIV).

Here in the United States we are preparing to celebrate Thanksgiving next week. But, you probably wouldn’t know it if you were to walk into any store here. Or in my neighborhood. Oh, there are the usual food items stacked up high on the shelves: pumpkin pie filling, cranberry sauce, gravy, bags of bread crumbs for the stuffing, appetizers, turkey themed decorations. But, if you were to look next to these displays you would also notice the Christmas foods and decorations, given equal shelf space.

In my neighborhood I’ve noticed people have put up their Christmas trees. This juxtaposition of two holidays, each vying for attention, has created a bit of a controversy. Some people embrace the early decorating for Christmas, while others, like myself, believe we should celebrate each holiday as it comes and to not rush things.

Is it possible that we have chosen to rush past Thanksgiving, because we aren’t thankful? Or because it is only a single day, not an entire season. I have heard arguments for both viewpoints. But it has paused me to think about it.

And I have to admit, I have not been in a very thankful mindset lately. I have complained about everything costing so much, thanks to inflation. The budget gets stressed and pushed and tested. And although I try to look past it, I finally realized that it has taken a toll on my joy and my thankfulness. I’ve tried to ignore for awhile, just rolling with it all, all the while thinking I was handling it all. Managing the budget and my soul.

That is until I was reading my morning devotional, while enjoying my morning cup of coffee, and it was like boom! Time for an attitude check. I realized that I was missing something in all my “managing” of myself. My joy. My peace. And most importantly; my thankfulness. I had replaced all of these with worry, anxiety, and complaining. Nothing extreme, nothing I would speak out loud to many people, but something I knew in my soul. The thoughts I was thinking to myself. The complaining that there wasn’t much extra spending cash available. But, I still want stuff. But why are there so many other necessities to buy? Why does it cost so much? Why aren’t the politicians understanding this is a big deal to most people. We are not rich, but I know it has been a stressor for us. I can only imagine how single parents and the elderly are dealing with all this inflation.

Maybe that is it. The reason for the early invasion of Christmas over Thanksgiving. People are wanting hope. Wanting peace. The peace that the birth of Jesus brought. And how are we supposed to be thankful anyway. What is there to be thankful for? Houses are not affordable. Food prices are high. Gasoline is expensive. Covid is still around.

But, Jesus’ birth is the reason we should have a grateful, thankful heart. He is our peace. He is our hope. He is our salvation. We are not helpless. We are not hopeless.

I have realized that this is what I have forgotten. Well, not forgotten per se, but just set aside, while I turned from my focus on Jesus, to my focus on myself, my stresses, anxieties and worries. It can be so subtle. Like when driving a car, and you see something on the side of the road. It catches your attention, so you turn towards it, only to quickly be brought back to the task at hand- driving- when the car ahead suddenly stops. You immediately are brought back to focusing ahead, rather than to the side of the road.

It is not until you are forced to turn back, that you realize, you head drifted your focus to the side of the road. Hopefully you stop in time to prevent a collision with the car ahead. So, my devotional was like the stopping of the car ahead of me. Whoops!Time to focus back on God, instead of allowing it to drift towards complaint, worry, stress, anxiety. I traded joy and thankfulness for a brief side view of my problems.

The problems will still be there. Inflation. Holiday stress. Traffic. Difficult people. They are still vying for my attention from the side of the road.Waving at me to look at them. But, just like safe driving; I must keep my eyes fixed on the author and perfecter of my faith; Jesus. The journey ahead is what I need to focus on- even though some might think this means to race past Thanksgiving, it doesn’t.

I am not giving permission to race ahead of Thanksgiving to celebrate Christmas already. I want to take my time. Be still. Keep each holiday to itself. And quiet the complaining thoughts in my head. Remind myself what I have to be thankful for this year. Change my perspective.

When I change my perspective, shifting my eyes back on Jesus, my attitude catches up and I realize I have a lot to be thankful for this year. My budget is squeezed, but I can still travel to the store and buy food. My family is coming to celebrate. I have lost loved ones, but also celebrate the newest family member, my granddaughter. These problems will pass by, and will probably be replaced with problems. But, I can always choose to keep focused on Jesus to get through it all. Jesus is the best reason of all to be thankful this year. He is with me. He knows my problems, nothing comes as a surprise to Him, so I can rest and trust He has got this.

What are you thankful for?

God bless you- Nancy

Beautiful Feet

“How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!” Romans 10:15

I’ve never thought of my feet as beautiful. In fact, I’ve kind of had this love/hate relationship with my feet. They keep me balanced, enable me to walk from one place to another, and give me a place to put my socks and shoes. That’s the love part. But they also bring me problems like blisters and plantar fasciitis, a broken toe, and my least favorite- finding shoes that fit. My foot isn’t considered a wide size or a narrow size according to shoe manufacturers, but it is a bit of both; a narrower heel and a wider toe area. And don’t get me started about size. Shoe sizes in the US are measured roughly in inches, but are not so accurate and all the cute women’s shoes are found in smaller sizes and not in my larger shoe size. My husband always tells me that I have a popular size, since it is usually the one size that is always out of stock in the stores. Maybe. Either way, I’m not sure if my feet are beautiful, just functional.

But God thinks they are. At least from the viewpoint of sharing the Good News. As Paul wrote the verse from above in his letter to the Romans, he was using it in the context of those sent to reach others with the Gospel; the Good News. The news that would give the people hope and joy. He referred to a passage from Isaiah 52:7 which prophesied the coming Messiah.

We probably don’t think about messengers traveling about on foot, bringing news- good or otherwise- as was common in Isaiah’s time or Paul’s in which letters were written and then hand delivered and read aloud. We are use to messages being sent through the internet or text. Oh we still have deliveries in person, like the mail (or post), or Amazon, or Doordash, or Uber eats or similar delivery and we get excited for these good things brought to our doorstep.

We might even look forward to these special deliveries, either the delicious food we are anticipating or the long desired items we ordered. As in Isaiah’s day, the people looked forward to someday being delivered from their bondage, delivered from sin, when the messiah would come. Isaiah’s Good news was the redeemer was coming; Paul’s Good news; He had come.

Our Good News he has come to deliver us and will come again. For now we can have peace with God through belief and trust in Jesus Christ. We can overcome being in bondage to our sins- the stuff we struggle with, it does not have to have power over us any more, thanks to the leading, directing,instruction and even comfort of the Holy Spirit. We also can look forward to the time of Jesus’ return with great anticipation when everything will finally be made right. A time with no more death or crying. No more wars.

We, as believers are all called to share this Good News, this great hope we have that the future is not dim, but hopeful. We all have beautiful feet! Not just those with the cute, small feet that fit into those perfectly cute shoes. Not just those who are pastors or missionaries. But all feet.

It is the message that makes the feet of the messenger beautiful. Let us keep on sharing this Good News, and encouraging one another on this faith journey. -God bless you, Nancy

And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love- 1Corinthians 13:13

So, in the last few years I have had this aversion to weeds. In my yard, in the flowerbeds, in the cracks in the driveway. But, it wasn’t always this way. When my husband and I moved, we moved into a neighborhood that has this thing against weeds. I am in awe of all the perfectly kept lawns here. Not a weed in sight. Perfect and green. And then, there are the HOA inspectors who ride through the neighborhood on Monday mornings. looking for any code violations. They look for any lawns that need mowing or trash cans left out. If there are, the homeowners will get a letter in the mail with a notice to either comply or pay a fine.

I’m not a fan of paying fines, so I am obsessed with following their rules. And attempting to get this perfect lawn. Well, it hasn’t happened yet, despite our best attempts, so we live with the stray weed or two.

Growing up, I really didn’t mind them. I thought the ones with little flowers were actually kind of pretty. I didn’t think of them as weeds really, just flowers that grew by chance. I saw their beauty instead of their annoyance.

So, this past week as I was taking our elderly dog out for a walk in our back yard, I spotted an annoyance. Except, it really caught my attention in a good way. It was standing out where and when it shouldn’t be standing out. It wasn’t so much as an annoyance as beautiful reminder of hope.

This year has been very trying on me and on my patience. I keep waiting for the right opportunities to come forward- applying for jobs and praying that I will actually get to use what I am called to do. I have also watched as neighbors have died from Covid, leaving behind children and spouses. I have seen relatives grow older and frailer, making me look at the future with a bleaker, pessimistic view. I have felt my patience tested, even with my elderly dog, who is not only blind but I think has a slight case of dementia. Do dogs even get that? She requires multiples trips outside to do her business, one trip after another, sometimes five trips in two hours.

So, on a cold morning this past week, as I grumpily took the dog out, I spotted a very bright and welcomed little flower spouting proudly from the lawn. It shouldn’t be there I mused- not because I did not want it to be there, but, you see we had had a frost a few days before. The lawn had been covered in a beautiful layer of frost. It is supposed to kill all the grass and the fragile plants. But, no, this beautiful dandelion was this bright spot of yellow on the now brown, dead grass.

It hadn’t bloomed with all its buddies in the summer or early spring, but here it was in November, standing up as the singular bright spot of life. It was a reminder to me, that despite the year that has seen both bright and bleak spots, there is still life and hope. It was a reminder to stay faithful, keep hope alive, and there will be a bright spot coming soon. It isn’t in our timing, but in God’s timing.

Sometimes I feel like that little dandelion. Everyone of my friends seemed to bloom earlier, in the summertime and springtime, and here I am in the autumn of life, blooming or hopefully soon to be, with all the hopes and dreams I have had for years. But, maybe that’s okay. Maybe, like that flower, I can be a bright spot in other people’s lives, when they are feeling the bleakness around them.

Most people have read the verse above, and remember it from weddings and the talk of love as the greatest, but I was reminded that in this verse, faith, hope and love are connected. Faith is believing, hope is putting our trust in and love is what God has shown us in sending His son. Never give up on believing, on faith, on hoping. For God never gives up on loving us. -Amen

Beloved

“I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine.” – Song of Solomon 6:3

Today, our son is getting married. Like other weddings I have been to, it will be a day to celebrate the love between my son and his bride. Many family members have traveled to witness this beautiful ceremony and reception. To join in celebrating with the couple this very special day, when they affirm their covenant before God to love each other no matter the circumstances.

I often think about our wedding celebration that is yet to come with Jesus. For Christians, we have this promise that some day, we, as the bride of Jesus, will be presented at the wedding feast of the Lamb. We will eat and celebrate together with Jesus and all of us will be beautiful, radiant, and unblemished. We will be healed and whole.

And I wonder, as I think about this upcoming celebration, if Jesus will gaze at his bride, the church, as a groom gazes delightfully at his bride. You see, I have seen it before, in my son as he looks at his fiancee and as my son in law looked at my daughter on their wedding day- also this year. He was totally captivated by her.

Life is so busy, and I think I missed it before, but what I saw a few days ago, was nothing short of beautiful. The look on our son’s face- He and his fiancee were practicing their wedding dance, and there it was- for a moment- my son looked at her with a most beautiful gaze, an amazing moment of love- shining through in his eyes as he looked at her. It caught me off guard as I had seen them many times together, but in that moment, I could imagine also, of the way Jesus will look at us, his bride with love.

A love that is sincere, captivating, beautiful. May we look forward to that day with all hope and anticipation. It will be a day to celebrate and will wipe away every bad memory of this sometimes long, difficult and tedious life. May it give you hope to think of Jesus looking at you with a love that is sincere, captivating and beautiful. Amen. – God Bless Nancy.

A Joyless Church

Have you seen one? Have you been to one? By definition, joyless means “not giving or feeling any pleasure or satisfaction; grim or dismal.” (Dictionary of Oxford languages, Google, 2021). Grim? Dismal? Not giving any feeling? Wow. Yup. I have seen it before. To their defense, a church without joy is probably more common than not, given the current world status. But… Um. aren’t Christians carriers to the greatest message ever? Like the GOOD NEWS? Aren’t they suppose to be happy? Joyful? All the time? Well, realistically, we cannot all be happy all of the time. Life is difficult, but overall, we, that is the body of Christ, or the church, should stand out from the world with a hope. A hope that we cling to and rely on to keep us steadfast in our faith.

What causes the joyless church? Well, as mentioned, many people are under great stress and it affects everyone. A worldwide pandemic that refuses to let go of its hostage (the world) is affecting us all, believers and unbelievers alike. But, maybe it is also that we have forgotten the one who brings us hope and joy. Maybe we neglect Him and the message of hope found in the Gospel. Or maybe we have been idle.

The apostle Paul mentions the brothers (and sister, for that matter) who are idle in his letter to the church at Thessaloniki. He writes, “We hear that some among you are idle and disruptive. They are not busy; they are busybodies.” (2 Thess. 3:11, NIV). Ouch Paul.

I wonder what he would think of us now? Would he call us idle and busybodies. Perhaps. But, it has me thinking that maybe that is the root of the joyless churches. Not doing anything to help others, except talk. Or argue. Or gossip.

I have felt the most joy whenever I have been sharing the Gospel or offering an apologetic response, or praying with someone, than when I am just sitting in a church service. To be honest, at times, my mind just wanders during the service. I have heard from others, who say the same. Maybe I am letting my worries and stresses crowd my mind, until they drown out the message of the good news. It is up to me then, to change my thinking, to focus ( and to share) with others the joy that is found in the good news. And to serve others. We have a reason for hope and joy, its time to celebrate and rekindle that joy again. -God Bless- Nancy

The Fullness of God

For God was pleased to have all the his fullness dwell in him and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood shed on the cross.-

Paul to the Colossians 1:19-20

So, I have been feeling a bit stuck lately, despite understanding this process of life moving forward. See, even if we understand it and try to find our stride and run our race, we can get overwhelmed at times. We think there is something we should be doing and are falling short. Or it is something we should be doing better. Maybe its reading our Bibles more, or praying more, maybe being a better person, or saving our money better. There is always that “more” we could and should be doing and goals we should be meeting. We put guilt and blame on ourselves when we do not measure up to other people’s standards. So, we might feel overwhelmed and instead of pushing ourselves, we kind of allow ourselves to get into a slump. This is especially true when our goals are unrealistic, or we are trying to meet these goals because someone else is putting pressure upon us. It might be our friends, or our jobs or our family. But we find ourselves so overwhelmed by these “coulds” and “shoulds” and goals to be like others or be the best, that we choose rather to fall into a pit of self- loathing and condemnation. We feel bad for our feeling bad also, compounding our circumstances and well, we feel stuck. Notice I said we “feel” stuck, while the truth is we might say we are stuck, but what we actually should say is that we are feeling stuck. We do not desire to run our race for we believe it is impossible to complete it well. We give up. Our hope is gone. We cannot see ourselves as good, or as accomplished already, realizing all the distance we have already covered in this race. We only look at our shortcomings. We don’t see how far we have come.

It is difficult to get out of a slump like that. To find encouragement and make peace with ourselves about our shortcomings. We need a different perspective. A change of view to help us see who we are and how we are already good, and loved, and full of hope for the future. This race of life is not about how we measure up and whether or not we meet our goals. We are already loved and treasured by God. He has given us the qualities and characteristics he has by His design and purpose. And He doesn’t expect us to be perfect. He knows we will fall short. But, when we fall down in despair, feeling like there is no hope, no point in the race to be the best, he reaches down, grabs our hand, and picks us back up. We are weary of trying to be all we should be, tired of measuring up to the world, and He gets that. He knows we need Him, but He doesn’t wait for us to pick ourselves up, He offers a hand.

At least, this has been my experience. Like this morning as I picked up my Bible to read. I found this passage in Colossians. Well- I didn’t just discover it- I was reading through the letters of Paul and this was the verse that stood out to me. “The fullness of God” these words just stood out. I have studied the Bible, read the passage, wrote papers on the deity of Jesus, but in that moment, it was as if God was reaching out His hand to pick me up, the fallen runner on the ground. As I read the beginning commentary in my Bible about the letter, the commentator wrote that the letter was of concern to Paul and he wrote it because several people of the church in Colossae believed that they had secret knowledge beyond the Gospel and that somehow Jesus dying on the cross was not enough. His letter was sent them to explain that salvation was complete in Jesus’ death and resurrection and that Jesus was fully God, divine and died and rose again.

This right here is reason alone to get excited, that salvation is complete, nothing else needed- no secret works, or knowledge, but divinely orchestrated and completed. But…. after I read the passage I also picked another book I had been reading (Paul Copan’s Is God A Moral Monster?) Copan explains what happened on the cross as Christ gave up His life. See, I had been taught that when Jesus was taking on the sins of the world, God the father could not watch, that’s why Jesus cried out “My God why have you forsaken me?” But, according to Copan, God was there. In the lightening, thunder, earthquake and the tearing of the temple curtain. As Copan explains, look back at God’s meeting with Moses on the mountain. There was thunder, lightning and an earthquake. Whaaaat? Like I looked it up(Exodus 19). Yup, right there! How could I miss it? God didn’t just send Jesus, the son and leave, preferring not to watch His son suffering, He the father was right there. In that darkest hour.

For me that was so encouraging this morning. We forget sometimes how awesome Jesus really is. he is the fullness of God, not less than. I am encouraged this morning at the greater perspective I now have about the cross. it has lifted me up, just as a hand up from God, to this fallen runner. -God bless Nancy

Don’t Miss It

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds (Hebrews 10:24, NIV)

This week has been difficult. Not going to pretend that it hasn’t. But not so much for me as for others that I know either personally or through a friend of a friend. Life is difficult at times and it is only complicated with the “ever- hanging on” world- wide pandemic. It seems like it just won’t give up its grip. It is easy to get discouraged at these times in our lives. We are looking for the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel, only to discover it is a train coming straight towards us. It is overwhelming and if anyone considers it soberly, thoughtfully, they can find the secondary affects of this stress filled global situation. If it seems to you that people have become angrier and lashing out at others, then you have the same thoughts as I have. The world is reeling from the stress and people are just reacting to the fear they are experiencing. Anger is a a secondary emotion that is caused by hurt, fear or a perceived threat or hurt.

As a Christian, I am not immune to feelings of fear, or hurt or anger. The difference is that I can take all these fears, and hurts and bring them to the feet of Jesus. I can ask for His wisdom and ask for help in dealing with it all. I can ask Him to help me forgive others. I do not have to solve it by myself. I do not have to let it all get the best of me. Although, I admit sometimes I let it do just that; get the best of me. I get overwhelmed, stressed out, angry, hurt and discouraged. I fall short of giving it to Jesus first, preferring to struggle on my own for a bit. But just when I get comfortable trying to deal with it in my slump, God shows up with a reminder of the good that is left in a world of a global crisis.

It may be just me, but I have noticed something very remarkable in the past two weeks. While the world has been watching the Olympics and celebrating the medal winners and conversing about the athletes’ mental health issues, I have seen a beautiful picture of what it means to “Spur on one another”. I can’t help but notice that the talented athletes of the games, have been hugging, fist bumping and cheering on others, that is not only their own teammates, but their competitors. Winners do not gloat over themselves, but reach over the ropes, or walk around the ropes to hug and congratulate the other competitors. They represent different countries, different political viewpoints and ideologies, but here, at the Tokyo Olympics, they are just athletes, who act more like friends then competitors. The level of sportsmanship has been amazing. Countries who do not get along on the political stage, have athletes who walk up and hug each other. The common ground of course is their sport. They are all athletes who have trained hard and love their sport, and are not afraid to share in celebration and encouragement with others, regardless of where they live, or what country they represent. I have watched quite a few Olympics- not going to tell you how many- but for real, this is the one thing that really stood out in contrast to other Olympics. These athletes should be recognized for this sportsmanship. It is the way the world should be and needs to be now. It is what the church in particular should look like. This is what the author of the Book of Hebrews was reminding the Christians to do. Encourage others to keep on keeping on doing good deeds for others. Keep on believing. Keeping on having faith.

What I have seen from the Olympics has challenged me to find ways to encourage others. To offer hope, to praise their efforts, and let them know I am pulling for them. Is there anyone in your life you can encourage? To build up and not tear down? To spur them on in their faith walk? This is what we are called to do. -God Bless- Nancy

Beautiful People

“How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!”- Paul, Romans 10:15

Have you ever met any beautiful people? No, I’m not talking about the good looks of some people, or of “the beautiful people” of privilege, or status, or of wealth, fame and education- but, the really beautiful people. Those whose heart’s are open, kind, loving and beautiful.

My grandmother was a beautiful person, full of kindness and of love. I remember her as always smiling. She seemed genuinely glad to see me when I visited. She would come sit beside me on my grandparents over sized couch and talk with me. She also made the most delicious meals and made it look so easy. She was giving and generous towards others and shared her love of painting and art with others as she taught me how to paint and other how to create their own works of art from clay.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that she was perfect. She and my grandfather fought sometimes and she never liked to visit my mom- her daughter- at her home. But, despite her imperfections, she was beautiful. See, its not being perfect all the time or looking perfect all the time that makes a person beautiful; it is something from within that makes us beautiful or ugly.

If someone would have seen my grandmother arguing with my grandad, they would have probably judged her as unkind and even mean. But they would have been wrong. Too often we judge from the outside and miss the beauty within. The beauty of a diamond is the result of intense pressure and of cutting to reveal the sparkling facets. Beauty is often only revealed after the pain suffered. I’m not sure of the reason for my grandmother’s beauty or if she had experienced pain or suffering- I never thought about it much until now to be honest, but I’m sure there was a story. We all have pain in this life that can leave us bitter or better. Beautiful or ugly.

Last time I shared the need to embrace our pain and move forward anyway. Our pain can help others in providing hope of getting through some of the same things we have experienced. I recently watched another beautiful person who had gone through so much share her incredible story of hope. She calls herself nightbirde, in case you’d like to read her story. She did not sugar coat her life, but laid it out for all to hear and to read. She could be bitter, but she chose to be better- to question God about what she was dealt, but realized she discovered the beauty of God in the midst of pain and suffering. The story she told through music was of good news, of hope, despite the odds stacked against her.

It is this message of hope, of Good News, that is so beautiful. We are lowly instruments that get bruised, battered and torn apart because of this life, yet we carry this message of hope; of life; of the beauty and goodness of God. We can share this message, or choose to keep it to ourselves. We can look at the world around us with contempt, or we can embrace it and share God’s love. We have this choice to be beautiful on the inside and reflect God, or remain bitter at life’s unfairness; it is a choice. Our choice. -God Bless Nancy

Was it you?

Some days we can let our circumstances get the best of us. And our emotions. We get tired and we get cranky. On the outside we are adults, but on the inside we can act like an unruly two year old. We want our way, and when we don’t get it, we get upset.

The recent events of the world have stretched me and tried my patience to the point of my becoming that unruly two year old. I feel bad for feeling bad, which makes the situation worse, it seems. I have been the queen of self- criticism before, and on a particular, hot, tiresome August day, I acted both as a temperamental toddler and a self-critic. I was exhausted both physically and mentally. I had been fighting the constant battle of my thoughts. If you read my last blog, you know that I addressed fear versus caution in the midst of this pandemic. Most of the time, I can keep my perspective and my focus on Christ and the things that matter, rather than on the fears that continually get fueled by what I see and read. It is easy to give into fear, especially when you’re worn out and tired.

So, there I was, exhausted, worn out, stressed and alone in a gas station bathroom. I had had enough of it all. The worries of the pandemic, the fears of moving into new chapters of my life, the pressure of resuming my seminary classes after a summer break, the disappointments and disagreements between family members, and the late hour. I felt my eyes well up with tears, but I didn’t want to let myself cry. I’d have to walk back through the store portion of the station, and didn’t want to face anyone, even a stranger with my red eyes and running mascara. I quietly told God I wanted to give up. I’ve had enough. I knew that much of what had been happening in my personal life was a spiritual attack from the pits of hell, but I was just tired of fighting it.

In those moments of frustration and desperation, it seems like the most logical thing to say or think is to cry “Uncle”. Our faith is being stretched so much. We just want to throw in the towel and tell the Devil he’s won. We’ll stop trying to make a difference in the world. Just look out for number one, forget others, Isn’t that what the world tells us to do? Why go against the current? Why speak up for the truth? Why follow God? Why keep going to school to answer God’s call to be a pastor? How many war wounds and battle scars are enough God? I just wanna give up God, it’s not worth it anymore, can you help me God? If not, I’m giving up!

But, you were there. And you made a difference. I never saw you, might not ever meet you. But I know you had been there and must have listened to God’s voice, that still, quiet voice, to leave me a note in the bathroom that evening. It was such a clear message from God, that in my two- year tantrum mindset, I tried not to see it. I was just so fed up with everything. I know God it was really a note from you. An answer from you, not just from a person. You are pretty intentional, and you intended for me to see that little piece of folded paper.

There it was, a handwritten note, slightly damp from the water of the sink from others who had seen it, while they washed up. It was written in colored pencil or ink, and some of the writing from the back side of the paper had faded. But there was no doubt about the message; “Jesus loves you so very much” Simple. To the point. And not even a memorized Bible verse. Just the reminder I needed that late evening at a gas station bathroom. I recited in my mind the words over and over again as I walked back out into the parking lot. Jesus loves me. So. very. much. Not just the simple Jesus loves me this I know, of the familiar kids song, but different, personal, and just what I needed to hear from God.

So thank you, who ever you are, you made a difference in my world and hopefully in the world in general. Thank you for not giving up in telling the world that yes, in fact, Jesus does love them so very much. Maybe you were a child, who forget their handwritten picture on the sink earlier that day as you washed your hands, or maybe you were a teen or adult, who knew to hear God’s voice and share the love you know with the world who does not know of God’s love.

We all have a part to play in Christ’s kingdom if we are Christians. Don’t give up and throw in the towel. Your action might be small, like a little piece of paper on a sink. But you make the difference in the world.

The world is desperate for answers, for peace, and for love. God has all that, and He is offering it freely. We all need to encourage each other about God’s love for us. Of His truth. Of His peace He offers. Of His hope that does not disappoint. Of His answers to prayer, that sometimes come in the form of little notes left on sinks.

Maybe you are looking for answers, be sure not to overlook those little quiet voices, reminding you to look to God for those answers. Be quiet enough to listen so that you don’t miss them. They might come in the form of a little, folded, love note from God. God hears you.